Slowdown

I am in Virginia visting my family for the holiday and boy am I ready for a little bit of a slowdown. I sure Hope I am able to get rested and relax this weekend.

Happy Holidays to you and yours!

Firm Foundation

It has been a busy two weeks for me and I feel like I have been running 100 mph non-stop. 

I have been tearing up Kentucky's Golden Triangle for work recently, primarily spending my days in Louisville working on an inspection program implementation. I will say for the most part, that I enjoy my job because it is constantly dynamic and always provides a challenge for me, but not staying at home has been tough and I am grateful when I am home in my bed.

In my personal life, the past couple of weeks have also been a reminder of the strength that I possess within myself. I am not always the quickest learner; I have always been a 'learn by doing' individual, that makes the same mistakes a few times before I realize something doesn't work. The difference is that by acknowledging my strength and standing up for myself, I have begun to realize when I am in the midst of something that is not working and am able to assess and correct this.

Between work and personal life I feel like I am truly growing up. While working hard on myself and enjoying all that I am so lucky to have, I have grown to a place where I am strong to stand for myself and focus inward and proceed upward. I was reminded of all of this today as I was catching up on blogs and stumbled across a note from Things We Forget that captures it perfectly.

It makes me feel at peace and really realize that, while cliche, everything happens for a reason.

Mid-November?

Mid-November?! The last time I looked, it was June!!! I honestly can't remember what I have been doing since my trip to Florida in October; Everything has been just a whirlwind.

I can tell you that my fall and Halloween season was full of haunted houses/ trails, pumpkin fields, horror movies, and fun with friends.

A Birthday with the Family

Two weeks ago I ventured to (sunny) Ft. Lauderdale for my father's 60th Birthday. My sister (over at HelloSweetWorld) and I have not been together with my Dad for 2 years and 11 months, which is quiet a long time since we all used to live in Southwestern Virginia together.

It was a great weekend for me to get away having had a few crazy weeks. My father didn't know we were coming and was very surprised. We spent the weekend talking and catching up, going to the beach, and even had a nice dinner and an evening out for drinks. 

Dad

Lauderdale-by-the-Sea, FL

For now, my travel season has stopped and I will be staying put in Lexington. I am looking forward to just being able to be home more and sleep late on the weekends. My roommate is super excited for Halloween, I've already been taken to haunted trails and more are in store, a Halloween party is on tap, so I'm sure it will still be an adventure. I'm looking forward to it.

Sticks and Stones and Words

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

As an American child, most of us have been taught this phrase and repeat it to our 'mean friends' on the playground many times. Being an adult, I have to simply say that this saying simply does not ring true... for me at least. The past few weeks have been busy with work but I have also had very emotional and trying personal situations. These situations have taught me about a lot about myself as well as others in the areas of discernment, honesty, trust, self-worth, and negativity.

Let me start by saying, I am in no way, shape, or form, perfect. I am a human-being with needs and desires like everyone else and while I wish to always make the most admirable decisions, I indeed and give in to fleeting, temporary things. I will also say that when it comes to judgment, I generally beat myself up for things I do wrong, that I do not need the negativity or judgement from anyone else-- thanks to my amazing friends for pointing this out to me.

All that being said, I have been naive and genuine in trying to meet additional friends in Lexington and also trying to find companionship. Through all of this I have opened myself up to people who seem to be genuine people with kind hearts and similar interests, but can myself around critical very critical people. I have been pushed these past couple of weeks, feeling insecure and maximizing my emotions to a weakened point that I have not felt in about a year.

My lessons from this are invaluable. Discernment. I have got to open my eyes to red-flags and abnormal behavior and identify this in my life. It's not that I ignore them, but I need to limit myself and discern what is appropriate as well as what I can withstand emotionally. I have been through a lot in the past couple of years of my life, but have come out ahead of it all and refuse to be in that dark place again.

It's been a learning experience for me, in the least. I already feel stronger and, oddly enough, happier. Blogging about this experience is not easy, and not intended to be a call for help to my family and friends (I am fine), but encouragement to anyone else who comes across negativity in the world. Stand strong, and believe there more good in the world than bad... you just have to search for the strength within to wade through.

Busy Thoughts

To start, let me state the obvious and say that it has been over a month since I have blogged. The tail end of my summer has been full of trips, a heavy workload, local weekend festivities, and the overall dealings of day-to-day life. I've been to Michigan to visit a friend, Florida (Fort Myers to be exact) to hijack my parents' vacation, and put in countless hours of report writing/ compiling for projects at work.

Kalamazoo, MI

Picnic with the Pops in Lexington, KY 

View over Bowditch Point Park in Fort Myers Beach, FL

Things have slowed down a bit now and I have thoughts of days past and current that I am dealing with. I have recently become very aware of all I have accomplished in my 24 years on earth. I also am very aware of my dreams and desires for my life and realize I have a lot of ground to cover. The conflict lies in the fact that I would like to pursue a number of these dreams but doing so may not be the most 'responsible' or 'safe' by societal standards (and my family's).

My sixth anniversary of living in Lexington has come and gone and I find myself somewhat rooted here. My problem is I don't feel settled here, per se. I find myself desiring other things for my life and struggle with what exactly that is and making preparations to pursue other dreams. Thinking about pursuing dreams and settling down has left me with the difficulty of not growing complacent, bitter, or withdrawn from other activities I generally would enjoy because I am in Lexington.

It is hard to see what is on the horizon when you know you want a change of scenery or pace, but you have no idea where to start. I know I will figure out, but I struggle with my nature of planning it and having the stars perfectly aligned before I leap and sometimes we just have to go. 

Alas, time will tell what's in store and I'm going to keep on trucking now and "suck the fun out of this place" as a good friend phrased it. 

FIFTY States!!!

Today I am expanding my boundaries and heading to The Great Lakes State with a good friend of mine. (That's Michigan for those of you that may not know.)

Leaving for this trip got me thinking, "How many states have I been to in this mammoth country?" The answer is 23 (if you count Michigan). I've got a lot of ground to cover!!!

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Life and Love

There's been a few things going on here and there, mostly work and spending time with my friends. I threw an engagement party for two of my very close friends whom are engaged to be married in less than a year. It was a little stressful getting commitments and everything arranged, but it went off without a hitch and I think we all enjoyed ourselves.

These friends are very dear to me and I can see the happiness they hold in each other and it just makes me warm. They are also in the process of moving away and it has brought a lot of mixed emotions for me. I have mentioned before that I do not feel settled here in Lexington, but I don't know where to go next. I know I want the hustle and bustle of a bigger city and really any of the top 20 metropolitan cities in the United States would suite me, but that's kind of a broad start.

Thinking about moving and throwing an engagement party has also made my realize my single-ness. I remember being a young boy dreaming of having that best friend to spend my life with and this still holds true today. I am at a place right now where I would like to have that relationship and that companion, but I have also been through some tumultuous relationships and enjoy my freedom.

It all goes to say that I am probably exactly where I should be at the moment. I am busy at work, not sure where to go next, and content on my own right now. It's funny how we constantly wish for something and then suddenly you realize, "Wow. I'm in a great place."

La La Land

A close friend of mine got married last weekend in Southern California. I was fortunate to be able to travel to Los Angeles to spend some time with her and her family and attend the wedding as well as have a little vacation. This trip was much needed, for I have been very busy and I just needed some time away.

My friend's wedding was gorgeous. She put a lot of effort into making it her dream wedding and to make sure the guests enjoyed themselves. The wedding was in a quaint church in Orange County with the reception at an awesome venue down in the Newport area. I am truly happy for the bride and groom. They are one of those couple that are 100% made for each other.

Ceremony

Reception

After the wedding, I spent two days in Hollywood with a very close friend of mine from San Diego. We haven't been friends for very long but have a connection of life-long friends that I just don't find very often. We have a lot of the same views of life and have been through very similar circumstances. We spend the entire two days just talking, and some some sights here and there. We spent the afternoon at The Getty, ate at an awesome restaurant (Gladstone's) in the Pacific Palisades,  walked around Venice, got lost in downtown Los Angeles, and (of course) watched the painted California sunset.

The Getty

View of Century City from The Getty

Patio at Gladstone's

Venice Studio Shop

I had a phenomenal time. The weather was perfect, there was so much to do, and I had great company. I now understand why so many people choose So. Cal as their home and as with most of my trips, I want to go back.

Summer Fun

This past weekend I went down to the Red River Gorge with friends to swim and relax. We even took the time to jump off a huge rock.

Nada Valley Tunnel

The Jump

Gorge Famous Pizza

Ciclovia

Every place I have lived in Lexington has been walking distance from my work and at most a miles walk. My recent move has taken me a mile further, totaling my distance from work to 2 miles. Given my record of morning punctuality, I cannot walk this distance and have taken up to biking to and from work. I. LOVE. IT. 

My Trusty Steed

I got my bike from a friend of mine, it's an old girls bike that doesn't have any gears and comes with it's fair share of quirks, but I've bonded with it quickly. I love riding it almost everywhere.

Not only is biking healthy, but its fun, sustainable, and just makes me feel better all around. Not to mention it is in my blood, being Dutch and all. I have committed to Clif Bar's 2 Mile Challenge and have really gotten into it, logging my rides, taking different routes, even biking to the grocery store.

     

BIKING FACTS

• 40% of U.S. trips are 2 miles or less
• 90% of those trips are by car
• 12 bicycles can be parked in the same space as 1 car

It's not all fun and games though. You have to be smart, conscious, and aware of everything going on around you. I have been laughed at numerous times, had names shouted at me, honked at, run off the shoulder by bus drivers, the list can go for pages. But I have enjoyed it and really miss it on the days that I cannot bike (because of work).

My Evening Commute

If you have a bike and live less than 2 miles from your destination, I challenge you to bike. It may be tough the first time of two, but it's worth it!

I'd Settle for a Slow Down

The past twenty days have been somewhat of a whirlwind. I have been settling into my house, adapting to a roommate and two very charismatic puppies, having work proposals rain down from the heavens, planning an engagement party, and travelling back and forth to Virginia to help my mother clean up the house.

New Roommates

Roanoke Star

Needless to say, updating my blog has been far from my priorities. I have been pondering how people do it with a family; it's just me and it is so crazy! The past few weeks have been very trying for me, pushing me to my limits creativity, brain power, and sleep. I have found myself wondering if I am in the right business or if I am just frustrated with growing up. During my teenage years I always worked and I dreamt of having a "grownup job" so I could pay my bills, but now I just long to sleep in past 9 a.m. I'm wondering if I have reached burnout where I am.... but I will figure out in time.

Alas, the working part of my summer has now slowed down and I am looking forward to my trip out to Los Angeles. Even though I am heading for a friend's wedding, I will have plenty of down time to explore the City of Angels and it's surroundings, enjoy all the restaurants (I'm kind of a foodie), and soak up some sun on the beach! I am very excited for some time off and relaxation. 

That's my adventure right now.... hope to blog about some fun things rather than just updates in the coming weeks.

Happy Friday

My life has been a whirlwind between moving, working, and maintaining (some sort of) a social life. One of my good friends sent me this video yesterday and it makes me so happy that I get energy to keep going. Enjoy!

Summer Solstice

Summer is here and I am really enjoying it! Today is the Summer Solstice in the eastern U.S. (or Midwestern, whichever you prefer). The days are sunny, warm, and long while the nights are cool and perfect for sitting outside. 

The summer always allows for beautiful days and amazing evening skies.

Go Solstice!

Moving Bungalows

It is moving time for me. I am not leaving Lexington, but moving from one neighborhood to the next and gaining a roommate (or 3 if you count the dogs).  I am moving to the Kenwick neighborhood which is full of smaller, craftsman style homes built in the early 1930s.

This weekend the Kenwick Neighborhood Association hosted a Bungalow Home Tour. A Bungalow is a smaller, usually one story house, that became very popular post-World War I.

Typical Bungalow in Kenwick

The homes on the tour were either unique in their décor, design, or materials used. Each owner had done a number of renovations and each had a different take on the Bungalow style. It was nice day to stroll through my new neighborhood and the tastes of different people.

This move marks the 6th year chapter of my time in Kentucky and also brings to light a lot of emotions for me. I have enjoyed living here but feel as if my time here is nearing a close. Sometimes I wake up and spend the day feeling jaded (for lack of a better word) towards Lexington and all I have been through here. This move could be a preface for bigger change for me, but that's all speculative now. 

New versus Old

Back to the Blue Ridge

Recently I went back to the birthplace for the weekend. My favorite teacher from high school was retiring and there was a surprise gala in her honor. It was a great time for me to go back home and see old friends and my family. It had been almost 6 months since I had gone home.

View of the Blue Ridge Mountains
from here

I love having grown up in Roanoke, it is set amidst the Blue Ridge Mountains and while I would not like to return (at least until I am older), it is simply beautiful.

Things have been very busy lately and my mind has been turning a lot. I am in that “mid-twenty-something restless state”, where I know I am not where I want to be but majority of my circumstances make it difficult to leave. It’s tough knowing you want more and are ready for a change, but are weary of the ramifications. For now, my goal is to make a plan, and carry it out.

UK Chandler Medical Center

My Alma Mater has been constructing a new medical center for the past few years. On Sunday, the University of Kentucky hosted an open house of part of the world class medical facility that will bring state of the art medical treatment to the Commonwealth of Kentucky.

The first phase of the facility is opening this summer which includes a new parking structure, a new Emergency Department, and the Neuroscience, Trauma, and Surgical Services floors; all with a price tag of over $530 million. The facility is being constructed with the theme “Art / Science / Healing”, which is intended to incorporate elements of nature and art into the healing process.

New Pavilion at UK Chandler Medical Center

New Atrium Lobby

Photography Wall 

Ginkgo Sculpture

All in all, it is an impressive facility and I am proud to be a University of Kentucky Wildcat when I get to experience something like this.

A Capital Affair

Wow, it has been a busy couple of weeks! Work has been busy and I have simply just had nothing to blog about except for rainy weather. The tides have turned however, with a few days of plentiful sunshine and a once in a lifetime experience.

The company I work for recently won a Kentucky Small Business Development “Pacesetter Award”. This award recognizes high performing second-stage businesses that are producing innovative -products, increasing sales, creating jobs and serving communities in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. This has been a huge honor for my firm and has created a small buzz of excitement around the office.

Wednesday I attended a few activities in the state’s capital of Frankfort to honor the recipients of this award.  The morning consisted of an award ceremony in the Capitol Rotunda, which is an impressive building that I have never stepped foot in. Following the award ceremony, a few employees were selected by my boss to attend a luncheon at the Governor’s Mansion.

 Kentucky Capital Building

Governor's Mansion 

Luncheon in the Governor's Mansion

The Governor was supposed to be in attendance, but had to cancel for some other obligation, which I was sort of bummed about. None-the-less, it was an honor to be there for the award festivities.

Summer Plans

This week I have been finalizing some of my summer plans and I am super excited.

 Roanoke Star

Springfield Park Central Square

L.A. 

Fort Lauderdale Beach

Thunder Over Louisville

Last weekend I went with some friends to Thunder Over Louisville (known by Kentuckians as “Thunder”). This is the kick-off of the Kentucky Derby Festival and is supposedly one of the best fireworks show in the United States; I, however, still have no clue. The weather in Kentucky recently has been stormy and this was the case over my trip to Louisville for Thunder.

Louisville's Riverfront

We still had fun, we went downtown for the festivities but the weather was prohibitive so we went back to the hotel and then out on the town for some drinks later. I had a blast, even though we didn’t see what we went for.

Thunder Fireworks 2010

Source: Derby Festival

Since last weekend, the weather here has been pretty stormy. We have had a storm about every other day and this weekend we’ve had one about every 5-6 hours with threats of tornadoes too. It has been interesting for me because I have a huge fear of tornadoes. I am ready for some springtime sun to say the least.

Dutch Dreaming

About this time last year I was in the Netherlands enjoying the springtime. While I returned this past year in February, I am longing to be back this spring. My mind is filled with thoughts of what my life would be like there.

(Spuiplein, Amsterdam)

 

(Tulip fields in Lisse)

Expectations

As I have grown up, I realized I carry a lot of anxiety with me about a lot of things ranging from my financial budget to relationships and vacations to workload. I'm in my mid-twenties and have realized that this is a ridiculous way to live my life. My struggle, however, is how to cope with it.

Let me elaborate. 

In my early years of adolescence or being a teenager, somewhere along the way I was completely sold on the idea that life should be perfect. And I mean picture perfect. Not necessarily in terms of getting married, buying a house, having the standard American 2.5 kids, etc, but even down to the minut details of folding my clothes, never getting in arguments with friends or family, and even overdrawing my bank account. As I am a little older and hopefully wiser, I realize that this sort of thinking is very toxic to my well-being.

How do I change this?

The reality of it all lies deep in my expectations. It has nothing to do with actually overdrawing my account or my friends and/or family doing something wrong. It has to do with my thinking of how things will happen or the end result. The reality is that when I expect something or someone to change or do something differently and they do not, I become frustrated, anxious, and disappointed. Realizing that my expectations are what creates this anxiety and frustration is huge. It allows me to change my mentality and remain a little more positive about things. For example, when I (repeatedly) expect someone to be on time when meeting for drinks, when they have never been on time before puts me in a place of anxiety and frustration. Changing my mentality and expecting them to be running behind eliminates this anxiety and frustration and can help immensely. 

I am not perfect, however, and slip back into my old pattern of thinking. I was reminded of this recently when a very good friend of mine came to me extremely frustrated with a few situations in her life. In our conversation about her issues, I found myself explaining this approach to her, realizing that my own mentality has slipped in terms of my expectations. My mood and well-being has suffered a little bit by allowing me to be anxious and frustrated in a few situations.

It's nice to have those revelations every now and then. They keep us in check and really help us realize our growth (or sometimes lack thereof) and put us in check. 

A Night Out in San Diego

As I mentioned previously, I met a handful of people while on my “work-cation” in San Diego. I kept in contact with most of them while I was still in San Diego but one of the guys I met was a tremendous host, venturing out during a week of work, midterms, and preparation for Spring Break to show us some of San Diego’s nightlife.

We ventured out on the town starting in Midtown/Little Italy, at a trendy little bar called Starlite. This place was close I-5, so it was surprising that it was so cool inside. Having eaten already I did not get anything to eat, but was told the food was excellent. I did, however, try the Starlite Mule, which was their signature drink and frankly, one of the best cocktails I have had in my life.

Next, we headed back down to the heart of Little Italy and stopped for a beer at Craft & Commerce. This place was newer (I still can’t find it on Google Maps) and a small space, but it definitely made up for it with the atmosphere. The décor was designed around literature “craft” and they even played Books on Tape in the bathroom.

Lastly, we went to Syrah Wine Parlor down in the Gaslamp Quarter. This place was probably my favorites. The entire place is decorated in an Alice and Wonderland theme, with the steps down to the door giving you the feeling of falling down the rabbit hole; complete with a trick door and all.

Not only did we go to really cool places that were something different from the norm here in Lexington, but I had some of the best conversation I had in awhile. He was an inspiring individual that has moved around a bit, just making it work. We had a lot in common in terms of the expectations for life and it was really refreshing to meet someone who has felt what I am feeling in terms of wanting more out of life. I have only met one other person that truly understood or had insight into what I am feeling.

Our conversation that evening has left me asking myself “Why on earth am I in Kentucky if I’d rather be elsewhere?” – A question that I am trying to answer, but is so much more complex than simple geography.