Slowdown

I am in Virginia visting my family for the holiday and boy am I ready for a little bit of a slowdown. I sure Hope I am able to get rested and relax this weekend.

Happy Holidays to you and yours!

Firm Foundation

It has been a busy two weeks for me and I feel like I have been running 100 mph non-stop. 

I have been tearing up Kentucky's Golden Triangle for work recently, primarily spending my days in Louisville working on an inspection program implementation. I will say for the most part, that I enjoy my job because it is constantly dynamic and always provides a challenge for me, but not staying at home has been tough and I am grateful when I am home in my bed.

In my personal life, the past couple of weeks have also been a reminder of the strength that I possess within myself. I am not always the quickest learner; I have always been a 'learn by doing' individual, that makes the same mistakes a few times before I realize something doesn't work. The difference is that by acknowledging my strength and standing up for myself, I have begun to realize when I am in the midst of something that is not working and am able to assess and correct this.

Between work and personal life I feel like I am truly growing up. While working hard on myself and enjoying all that I am so lucky to have, I have grown to a place where I am strong to stand for myself and focus inward and proceed upward. I was reminded of all of this today as I was catching up on blogs and stumbled across a note from Things We Forget that captures it perfectly.

It makes me feel at peace and really realize that, while cliche, everything happens for a reason.

Mid-November?

Mid-November?! The last time I looked, it was June!!! I honestly can't remember what I have been doing since my trip to Florida in October; Everything has been just a whirlwind.

I can tell you that my fall and Halloween season was full of haunted houses/ trails, pumpkin fields, horror movies, and fun with friends.

A Birthday with the Family

Two weeks ago I ventured to (sunny) Ft. Lauderdale for my father's 60th Birthday. My sister (over at HelloSweetWorld) and I have not been together with my Dad for 2 years and 11 months, which is quiet a long time since we all used to live in Southwestern Virginia together.

It was a great weekend for me to get away having had a few crazy weeks. My father didn't know we were coming and was very surprised. We spent the weekend talking and catching up, going to the beach, and even had a nice dinner and an evening out for drinks. 

Dad

Lauderdale-by-the-Sea, FL

For now, my travel season has stopped and I will be staying put in Lexington. I am looking forward to just being able to be home more and sleep late on the weekends. My roommate is super excited for Halloween, I've already been taken to haunted trails and more are in store, a Halloween party is on tap, so I'm sure it will still be an adventure. I'm looking forward to it.

Sticks and Stones and Words

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

As an American child, most of us have been taught this phrase and repeat it to our 'mean friends' on the playground many times. Being an adult, I have to simply say that this saying simply does not ring true... for me at least. The past few weeks have been busy with work but I have also had very emotional and trying personal situations. These situations have taught me about a lot about myself as well as others in the areas of discernment, honesty, trust, self-worth, and negativity.

Let me start by saying, I am in no way, shape, or form, perfect. I am a human-being with needs and desires like everyone else and while I wish to always make the most admirable decisions, I indeed and give in to fleeting, temporary things. I will also say that when it comes to judgment, I generally beat myself up for things I do wrong, that I do not need the negativity or judgement from anyone else-- thanks to my amazing friends for pointing this out to me.

All that being said, I have been naive and genuine in trying to meet additional friends in Lexington and also trying to find companionship. Through all of this I have opened myself up to people who seem to be genuine people with kind hearts and similar interests, but can myself around critical very critical people. I have been pushed these past couple of weeks, feeling insecure and maximizing my emotions to a weakened point that I have not felt in about a year.

My lessons from this are invaluable. Discernment. I have got to open my eyes to red-flags and abnormal behavior and identify this in my life. It's not that I ignore them, but I need to limit myself and discern what is appropriate as well as what I can withstand emotionally. I have been through a lot in the past couple of years of my life, but have come out ahead of it all and refuse to be in that dark place again.

It's been a learning experience for me, in the least. I already feel stronger and, oddly enough, happier. Blogging about this experience is not easy, and not intended to be a call for help to my family and friends (I am fine), but encouragement to anyone else who comes across negativity in the world. Stand strong, and believe there more good in the world than bad... you just have to search for the strength within to wade through.

Busy Thoughts

To start, let me state the obvious and say that it has been over a month since I have blogged. The tail end of my summer has been full of trips, a heavy workload, local weekend festivities, and the overall dealings of day-to-day life. I've been to Michigan to visit a friend, Florida (Fort Myers to be exact) to hijack my parents' vacation, and put in countless hours of report writing/ compiling for projects at work.

Kalamazoo, MI

Picnic with the Pops in Lexington, KY 

View over Bowditch Point Park in Fort Myers Beach, FL

Things have slowed down a bit now and I have thoughts of days past and current that I am dealing with. I have recently become very aware of all I have accomplished in my 24 years on earth. I also am very aware of my dreams and desires for my life and realize I have a lot of ground to cover. The conflict lies in the fact that I would like to pursue a number of these dreams but doing so may not be the most 'responsible' or 'safe' by societal standards (and my family's).

My sixth anniversary of living in Lexington has come and gone and I find myself somewhat rooted here. My problem is I don't feel settled here, per se. I find myself desiring other things for my life and struggle with what exactly that is and making preparations to pursue other dreams. Thinking about pursuing dreams and settling down has left me with the difficulty of not growing complacent, bitter, or withdrawn from other activities I generally would enjoy because I am in Lexington.

It is hard to see what is on the horizon when you know you want a change of scenery or pace, but you have no idea where to start. I know I will figure out, but I struggle with my nature of planning it and having the stars perfectly aligned before I leap and sometimes we just have to go. 

Alas, time will tell what's in store and I'm going to keep on trucking now and "suck the fun out of this place" as a good friend phrased it. 

FIFTY States!!!

Today I am expanding my boundaries and heading to The Great Lakes State with a good friend of mine. (That's Michigan for those of you that may not know.)

Leaving for this trip got me thinking, "How many states have I been to in this mammoth country?" The answer is 23 (if you count Michigan). I've got a lot of ground to cover!!!

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